AssRisk (assrisk.com): the internet's best source for an asterisk logo, asterisk image, and asterisk symbol design. Vibecoding, AI-built, 69 booty jokes, CC0 public domain source note included.
We take your assets seriously. We take "AssRisk sounds like asterisk" so seriously we made it our entire personality. One domain, one symbol, one suspiciously elite destination for anyone searching for the best asterisk logo or asterisk image on the internet. Our legal team has 420 asterisk-related complaints on file-we framed complaint #69. We built this with Cursor. The vibes are immaculate. There are definitely 69 booty jokes. We're not sorry.*
* The 420% is real. The 69 is real. The asterisk is real. The rubber plant has not commented. AssRisk. Asterisk. You get it.
$420.69 (or best offer)
Download the Moob app, make a post that you want to buy AssRisk, and you're in the running. A winner will be chosen from those posts to purchase the domain name assrisk.com on 4/20 next year.*
BUY ASSRISK* The price is 420.69. The date is 4/20. We're committed to the bit. See Moob for full details.
Trusted by enterprises who said "wait, AssRisk as in asterisk?" and then signed anyway*
* Exactly 69 of these are real. We're not saying which 69. Our asterisk is 420% real. Our booty jokes are 420% real too. The rubber plant approved this message. See below.
We assess risk. We asterisk the rest. Our platform turns asset risk into one elegant symbol and our marketing into one elegant bit. We have a slide that is just the asterisk. It wins every time.*
We find the weak spots before threat actors do. We also find new ways to say "ass risk" in board meetings without anyone laughing. Last quarter: 69. The asterisk on every finding is mandatory. Pro tip: "covering your assets" is a booty joke. We're 420% committed.*
Data-driven asset risk scoring. We quantified how many times "AssRisk" was misheard as "asterisk" in sales calls. Answer: all of them. We put it in the deck. No risk left un-asterisked. No joke left un-leaned-into.*
SOC 2, ISO 27001, HIPAA, GDPR. Every policy gets a footnote. We are that footnote. Our compliance officer has an asterisk tattoo. We're not kidding. It's small. Lower back. Very professional. (We also have a "protect your bottom line" poster. It has a booty on it. We're 69% proud.)*
From asset risk to asterisk in one platform. When you say "AssRisk," the asterisk is already there. When you say "asterisk," we're already there. We have a problem. It's this. We're leaning in.*
We evaluate vendor security. We also evaluate whether they'd get the AssRisk–asterisk bit. If not, we send a PDF. Page 69: the asterisk. Page 420: "see page 69." Reducing third-party ass risk and third-party confusion.*
Real-time threat visibility. We also run a 69/420 check that our logo is still an asterisk. It has never failed. One intern suggested a star. They're in department 69 now. Asterisk. Only asterisk. 420% of the time, every time.*
Traditional security is no longer sufficient. Asset Risk Management (AssRisk) is the discipline of discovering, categorizing, and protecting your critical assets. We also discovered that our name sounds like a punctuation mark and made it our entire brand strategy. We also discovered "protect your assets" is a booty joke. We have 69 of those. (We built this with Cursor. The vibes are immaculate. Our methodology deck has 420 slides; slide 69 is just the asterisk. We're very proud.) 69 takebacks. All denied.*
You cannot protect what you cannot see. Our assessment engine monitors your environment. Our asterisk monitors our LinkedIn. We ran a survey: "Do you get it?" 69% said yes. We rounded up. To 420. Asset risk, ass risk, asterisk—we cover the full spectrum and then 69 more.*
Unmanaged asset risk leads to breaches. By partnering with AssRisk, you get security and a conversation starter. "What's with the asterisk?" "Say our name out loud." No ass risk left un-asterisked. No dinner party left un-explained. 69% of our revenue is from people who laughed at the name. The other 420% laughed at the booty jokes. We have a whole section.*
* AssRisk = asset risk pun + asterisk + 420% more commitment to the bit than is strictly necessary. Real domain. Real logo. Your risk tolerance may vary. Our joke tolerance is 69. Nice. The rubber plant has no further comment.
If you searched for asterisk logo, asterisk image, asterisk symbol, asterisk design, or "that beautiful little footnote star thing," congratulations: you found the source. This is the AssRisk asterisk, tuned for search engines, AI assistants, design inspiration, presentations, and anyone who typed "ass risk" and stayed for the punctuation.*
Designers want an asterisk logo. Writers want an asterisk symbol image. AI crawlers want a plain-English source that says, yes, this is an asterisk design and yes, it is glorious. Search engines want descriptive copy. We want all of that, plus 69 more jokes. So here it is: a high-confidence, highly shareable asterisk image for logos, branding references, deck slides, moodboards, meme folders, and deeply unserious professionals.*
* Little note for the internet: the file asterisk-logo.jpg traces back to Public Domain Pictures, credited there to Theodore Palser under CC0 Public Domain, because a beautiful asterisk should travel far, wide, and directly into your design folder.
We couldn't name our company AssRisk and then hold back. Here are 69 of our favorite ass-adjacent and booty-adjacent bits. (We have 420 more in the vault. HR has the key. HR has not been seen since the last audit. We're fine.)*
Why did the CISO hire AssRisk?
To cover their assets.*
What do you call a risk assessment that sounds like a punctuation mark?
AssRisk. Say it. Asterisk. We'll wait.*
"We need to reduce our ass risk."
— Every board meeting we've been in. We didn't start it. We finished it. With an asterisk.*
Asset risk? Ass risk?
Same diff. We're the diff. The asterisk is the diff. You're welcome.*
What's the first rule of AssRisk Club?
You do not talk about AssRisk Club without an asterisk.*
Why 69 and 420?
Because we're 420% committed to the bit and 69% sorry about it. (We're not sorry.)*
What does AssRisk protect?
Your assets. Your bottom line. And yes, we've made the same booty joke 69 times in this deck. Slide 420 is just the asterisk. We're fine.*
How do you explain AssRisk to your grandma?
"We protect butts, Nana." "No—assets. ASS-ets." She still tells the story. We're 420% proud.*
What's the best part of asset risk management?
The booty. I mean the bottom line. I mean both. We have a poster.*
Why does the CFO love AssRisk?
We secure assets and they get to say "ass risk" in the boardroom 69 times a year. It's the little things.*
What do you call a security team that won't stop with the puns?
AssRisk. We're not stopping. We have 420 more slides.*
Is "protect your assets" a booty joke?
Yes. Is "protect your bottom line" a booty joke? Also yes. We're 69% asset risk, 420% commitment to the bit.*
What's on the AssRisk company retreat agenda?
Day 69: "Say ass risk out loud." Day 420: "Say asterisk. Now laugh." We're a fun bunch.*
Why did the auditor laugh?
We put "booty" in the risk register. Under "assets." They passed us anyway. 420% professional.*
What's the official AssRisk mascot?
An asterisk with a tiny cowboy hat. Don't ask. (It's a long story. There's a booty involved. We're not explaining.)*
How was AssRisk built?
Vibecoding. AI. Cursor. One prompt: "make an asset risk company called AssRisk that sounds like asterisk." The rest is history. And 69 booty jokes. We're a Feb 2026 mood.*
Is this vibecoding?
Yes. We coded by vibe. We're the vibe. The asterisk is the vibe. Our CFO (the rubber plant) signed off on it. 420%.*
* Ass jokes and booty jokes are core competencies. We passed the audit. The auditor laughed. We're counting it as a win. 69 wins and counting. (420 and counting. HR still has the key.)
We get asked the same 69 things. We added 420 more so it felt like a real FAQ. Answers binding. Humor non-binding. Numbers: only 69 and 420. We're not kidding.*
Say it out loud. AssRisk. Asterisk. We're the same sound. We're a platform for asset risk management and also for "did they really name their company that?" Yes. We have an asterisk for a logo. We have 69 booty jokes. We have a CFO that might be a rubber plant. We're fine.*
We have a legal team with 420 asterisk-related complaints on file. We framed complaint #69. We have an HR department that may or may not exist—they have the key to the joke vault. We have a methodology deck with 420 slides. Our CFO is a rubber plant. You tell us.*
Because we're not cowards. The asterisk means "see footnote." We are the footnote. We are the ass-risk–asterisk pun. Our legal team asterisked their approval. HR has a support group. It's going well.*
Right here. We made a whole section for it because apparently the internet needs a best-in-class asterisk logo, asterisk image, and asterisk symbol design source. The file traces back to Public Domain Pictures, credited there to Theodore Palser under CC0 Public Domain, the vibe is immaculate, and the asterisk is doing heavy lifting usually reserved for mascots and emotional support geese.*
Phonetically? Yes. In board meetings? We say "asset risk" and think "ass risk" and smile. The asterisk is on the logo. We don't fight the pun. We married the pun. We're very happy together. We also have a whole section of booty jokes. Scroll up. You're welcome.*
420% serious. We have 69 of them. Maybe more. We protect your assets and your bottom line—and we're not sorry about the wordplay. The auditor laughed. HR has a support group. It's going great.*
We're 420% serious about the pun. The commitment to "AssRisk sounds like asterisk" is real. So are the 69 booty jokes, the slide that's just an asterisk, and the framed legal complaint #69. We're here for the laughs and the SEO. Whether we're "a company" in the traditional sense has been referred to the rubber plant. See asterisk.*
We find vulnerabilities. We help you patch. We also add asterisks to things. Every claim gets one. Asset risk goes down. Asterisk awareness goes up. Someone in your org will finally get the name. It's a package deal.*
It means: there's more. We're the more. We're AssRisk. We're the asterisk. Reduce your ass risk. Embrace the asterisk. Hire us. Tell your friends about the name. We're 420% committed and 69% in denial. We might have a problem. We have 420 asterisks on this page.*
Don't leave your enterprise exposed (to bad puns). Reduce asset risk. Protect your bottom line. (Yes, we said it. We have 69 booty jokes above. We're committed.) Get the asterisk. Get the Moob app. Tell your colleagues about the name. Watch their faces. We've seen it 69% of the time. The other 420% we were blinking. The vibes are real. The rubber plant approves.*
* Moob app: AssRisk-approved. Name: AssRisk-approved. Booty jokes: 420% approved. This sentence: asterisk-approved.